Red Flags

 One of the books I read to learn about narcissism, how it shows up in relationships and how to break free, was Psychopath Free by Jackson MacKenzie. In the beginning of the book, it has a chapter called Spotting Toxic People and describes 30 Red Flags often seen in narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths. I could identify N in each and every one of them. It was really the first time I felt validated about what I had been going through and was continuing to go through at that time. I highly recommend reading the book, and I will go through a few examples of how the 30 red flags showed up in my relationship.  1- Gaslighting and crazy-making.  N had the habit of “disappearing “ and not answering texts. When I would ask what he was doing that he couldn’t answer, he would accuse me of not trusting him, being overbearing, too anxious, not trusting him. He would use his mental health issues as a need for space or time “alone”, and since I’m in healthcare, he would accuse me of being insensit


 Abuse comes in many forms, not just physical. It can be financial, verbal, spiritual, sexual and emotional. Many people use the excuse that ‘he/she doesn’t hit me, so…’ and they therefore put up with their partner’s shitty behavior. They are often gaslit to believe that they caused this behavior or that they deserved it. Often when you try to discuss the problem, they will say it didn’t happen or you are exaggerating, being too emotional or dramatic, that it’s not a big deal. Slowly, over time, you start to feel crazy, like you are losing your mind. For many, keeping a journal of the events or recording conversations/arguments can be helpful to remind you that you aren’t crazy, that the event really did happen as you recall. It will also come in handy when the time comes to go to court, so that you can show just what a vile monster they are. Abuse in front or around children teaches them a skewed ‘normal’ that will affect their entire life.  Visit Dr Ramani’s YouTube channel for many

Lies, and more lies

This is a list of many things Nathan commonly lies about… - General discharge (not honorable or medical) from US Navy in April 2021 - Deployed to Afghanistan September 2017- May 2018 (his only deployment) - Has 3 divorces, 3 kids, currently married in FL - Owes over $12000 in child support to 1 child, has never paid for the other 2 - Has delinquent taxes as well as performed tax fraud and bank fraud; history of bankruptcy; sued by Ally bank 2023 - Frequently uses alias (fake names) in addition to Nathan, Nate, Noah, NOA, most recently used Ty Bryant, Ty B, Peter Gabriel, Frank German, Frederick, Joe Foti, Ben Booger; Doc Bradley - Engagement ring given to Tracy, 3rd wife. Taken from her by Nathan before he moved to FL and has been given to other women since then.  - LV wallet taken from Tracy’s closet, also has been given to other women.  - 3rd wife's initials tattooed below cube - Roman numerals of marriage #3 on hand

Coming Soon

Have you wondered if your partner is a narcissist? Have you questioned your own sanity in your relationship? Are you finding out about your partner's lies, little by little, but unable to ask them for fear of their reaction? Well, if you are also here because you googled your boyfriend’s name, it’s a sign. Stay tuned for my story of marrying a narcissist- the lies, the abuse, the cheating, the drama...